[at-l] repost Monday, March 20, 2000

[Sloetoe]

It seems the time is right...
I even had strong wind shooting through the trees wake
me early this morning....


    * Subject: [at-l] Monday, March 20, 2000
    * From: "Thomas McGinnis"
<tmcginnis at ucclan.state.in.us>
    * Date: Mon, 20 Mar 2000 20:50:38 -0500

Today, my sons and I did not start a throughhike of
the Appalachian Trail.

Woke this morning at 02:34 am, just in time to welcome
Spring. Outside my window, a strong wind moaned and
whistled through the trees of the back yard — it was a
haunting sound that instantly took me back to repeated
mountain scenes where steady winds pushed heavily
through tall trees. It could have been one of a
hundred scenes anywhere from Georgia to Maine; it
could have been from my very first night on the AT
back in '79; it could have been from Roaring Fork
Shelter in early September of '98, when the wind
frightened my unflappable sons into looking around at
the tall swaying trees with wide eyes. It was a
powerfully lonesome wind; it was strangely
unforecasted.

My first thought was "Welcome, Spring!" My second
thought was that I should be listening to it from the
top of Springer poised to lead — or better 
*facilitate* — a throughhike of the AT by my family.
Instead, all I got was to listen to the wind — not a
taunt, not quite a wish, just a factual reminder — 
that a dream hatched five years earlier, almost to the
day, would not see fruition.

It was five years ago that it hit me like a
thunderbolt that, after 15 years of relative
inactivity in backpacking, and even with year old
twins and an aggressive mortgage, one *could* arrange
an AT throughhike without throwing all the
accouterments of society and career to the wind.
Careful planning could work around careers, mortgages,
primary educations, pension accruals, car payments,
volunteer activities, health concerns, ...a hike could
be made possible. 

And so work started. First by simply *not* taking
steps that restricted a six month absence — as simple
as not replacing the family cat when he died, to
timing the replacement of the family car to "March
2000" to avoid car payments, to postponing the search
for a new job (or restricting growth of a home-based
business) when the current "situation" suggested a new
course — these steps lightened the domestic situation.
And then by taking *positive* steps to bring about the
dream — increasingly positive steps as time went on —
the dream began to take shape. Each vacation took on
new meaning, when seen in light of "2000". Each family
trip involved more skills, more effort, more
backpacking, less camping, *lots* of learning.
Building step by step; all of the growth and effort
being balanced between raw enjoyment and the push to
learn new things. And over Labor Day, 1998, walking
from Davenport Gap to Hot Springs, it was evident that
we were ready — 1999 was to be a year to polish up and
relax.

I wanted the throughhike to teach us what we're made
of, to show what small, steady, and devoted efforts
can do, to make concrete and real the idea that most
of what we know as discomfort is in fact a passing
thing, and that certain satisfactions and quiet
accomplishments could serve a lifetime of use. What
does climbing a mountain — one heavy step at a time,
up past mind-numbing false summits, slipping in
rain-soaked clinging mud, only to get into a
face-soaking wind at the top — have to do with life in
the greater scheme of things? Everything. To reach
such a summit, whipping off your hood and yelling an
oath at the top of your lungs into the teeth of the
wind — that is to know an indomitable self-confidence
that is yet tempered by the humility of the climb.

Helen Keller said "Life is either a daring adventure,
or nothing at all." Thoreau said "Don't criticize them
as build their castles in the air; rather, work then
to build the foundations underneath them." The AT
taught me the truth of these: that dreaming is vital
to living, and discipline is vital to pulling it off.
In 20 years, I've used those lessons ten thousand
times.

Young minds are impressionable, and the AT throughhike
was to be these parents' lifetime innoculant to
children against all that is negative, fleeting,
passive, temporary, unsubstantial and inconsequential
in the greater society to which children are
unavoidably exposed while outside parents' protective
huddle. An AT throughhike, aside from all the lessons
geological, historical, biological and sociological,
would foremost instill the self-confidence to live an
internally driven *principled* life, minimally
affected by what's "cool" at the time. An AT
throughhike could instill a durable faith in self, in
family, and in God.

But no, we're not hiking. Life had other plans for us.

Still, for kids so young, they carry (so far) some
great lessons for life. They respect themselves and
others. They revel in ceremony, and yet they seem to
prize doing new things, too — or in doing common
things in unconventional ways. They welcome a
challenge — they feel free to test themselves, and to
say "Too much!" They feel free to say "I'm scared."
*and* to trust others who say "Try this!" They wonder
"What's down that trail?" and ask "Can we go that way
next time?" They treasure small things, and don't seem
swayed by every advertising scheme. They like
Szechuan, and they like Ovaltine. I'm not ready to die
yet, but what more could a father ask?

It is my fervent wish that those who are hiking this
year do their very best to not squander the great gift
to their lives which is an Appalachian Trail
throughhike. To make the most of it is to, as Thoreau
said, "suck the marrow from the bone of life." Whether
you successfully walk from one end of the AT to the
other, or whether circumstance besets you with trial
after trial to derail your progress, or whether you
feel your heart drained low in the relentless fury of
boredom which lays in wait for hikers seeking a
fantasy of unending backcountry pleasantries, and no
matter what courses your hike may steer, *do* ensure
that you make the most of each day you're out. Satisfy
yourself that each of your days had a purpose —
important and substantial no matter how seemingly
small. *Make* each day special, and you'll be
inoculating yourself for a lifetime against drift and
doubt and desolation and boredom. Thoreau said "The
majority of men live lives of quiet desperation."
Well, "Carpe Diem." Seize it! Your life is NOW!


See the moon roll across the stars  — 
See the seasons turn like a heart — 
Your father's days are lost to you;
This is your time here, to do what you will do.

Your life is NOW!
Your life is now!
Your life is now!
In this undiscovered moment,
Lift your head up above the crowd.
We could shake this world,
If you would only show us how — 
Your life is Now!

Would you teach your children to tell the truth?
Would you take the high road, if you could choose?
Do you believe you're a victim of a great compromise?
'Cause I believe: you change your mind, you change our
lives!

Your life is NOW!

Have just an adventurous, livable, day.
sloetoe

Spatior! Nitor! Nitor! Tempero!
   Pro Pondera Et Meliora.